Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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