Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
