I need help removing her.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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