You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
