I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Come share oat with me in your robe
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I currently don't understand fingers.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
