I hope mine doesn't look like that
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
He is an equal opportunity slut.
it glows. i had to have it.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
