no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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