I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I party with great urgency now.
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