There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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