I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
