I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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