we're chasing vodka with high fives
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
