before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
