I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
