Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize