Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
