How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Randomize
