You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
