I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
