So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
