Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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