singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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