did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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