My first STD was from a foam party
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
