He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
