Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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