whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
The ass gains better be worth it
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