I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
It's rum buckets o'clock
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
