Are we in a gay sports bar?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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