3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize
