im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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