uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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