Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize