I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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