the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize
