were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
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