She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
