You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
