closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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