Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
