Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
