wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
