weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize
