I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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