how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
