she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
