i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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