forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
