Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
