ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
